The Written Turd
"venus dear have you seen the red phone anywhere?" "oh my god, venus no"

"venus dear have you seen the red phone anywhere?" "oh my god, venus no"

"with everything"

"with everything"

although i am only eight,  i talk like a seventy four year old building superintendant whose lungs are slowly drowning in a brown cancerous mucous. 

although i am only eight,  i talk like a seventy four year old building superintendant whose lungs are slowly drowning in a brown cancerous mucous. 

uncle jessie: what?
uncle joey: yeah you did 2000 micrograms of lsd man!
uncle jessie: are you pulling my leg joey? rebecca is getting ready to walk down the aisle any minute!
uncle joey: yeah man, i put it in your hair tonic jess.
uncle jessie: surely no, surely no shhhuurrley noooo
uncle joey: yeah jess, i’ve always loved rebecca, she’s a real beautiful women: smart, talented and sexy, shit you look dizzy jess, you starting to feel that shit brO?
uncle jessie: i ought to kill you joey, it’s my flippin wedding!
uncle joey: hey does my sweater look all pulsatey?
uncle jessie: have mercy (bites knuckle)

uncle jessie: what?

uncle joey: yeah you did 2000 micrograms of lsd man!

uncle jessie: are you pulling my leg joey? rebecca is getting ready to walk down the aisle any minute!

uncle joey: yeah man, i put it in your hair tonic jess.

uncle jessie: surely no, surely no shhhuurrley noooo

uncle joey: yeah jess, i’ve always loved rebecca, she’s a real beautiful women: smart, talented and sexy, shit you look dizzy jess, you starting to feel that shit brO?

uncle jessie: i ought to kill you joey, it’s my flippin wedding!

uncle joey: hey does my sweater look all pulsatey?

uncle jessie: have mercy (bites knuckle)

i just want people to “like” me.

i just want people to “like” me.

meeza too.

meeza too.