“venus dear have you seen the red phone anywhere?” “oh my god, venus no”
although i am only eight, i talk like a seventy four year old building superintendant whose lungs are slowly drowning in a brown cancerous mucous.
uncle jessie: what?
uncle joey: yeah you did 2000 micrograms of lsd man!
uncle jessie: are you pulling my leg joey? rebecca is getting ready to walk down the aisle any minute!
uncle joey: yeah man, i put it in your hair tonic jess.
uncle jessie: surely no, surely no shhhuurrley noooo
uncle joey: yeah jess, i’ve always loved rebecca, she’s a real beautiful women: smart, talented and sexy, shit you look dizzy jess, you starting to feel that shit brO?
uncle jessie: i ought to kill you joey, it’s my flippin wedding!
uncle joey: hey does my sweater look all pulsatey?
uncle jessie: have mercy (bites knuckle)